How to Handle Divorce Smoothly in 2024

Divorce can be a tough and emotional journey. When a marriage ends, it brings a mix of emotions, challenges, and decisions that can feel overwhelming. However, approaching the process with preparation and understanding can make it smoother and less stressful for everyone involved.

Handling a divorce smoothly involves more than just the legal paperwork. It requires emotional and mental readiness, effective communication, and attention to the well-being of any children involved. By focusing on these aspects, you can navigate the process with greater ease and stability.

In this guide, we’ll explore practical tips for preparing yourself emotionally and mentally, communicating effectively with your ex-partner, handling legal steps and documentation, and supporting your children through the changes. With the right approach, you can manage your divorce smoothly, paving the way for a better future.

Preparing Emotionally and Mentally for Divorce

Going through a divorce can be emotionally draining and mentally taxing. Preparing yourself emotionally and mentally is crucial to handling the process smoothly.

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings: It’s normal to feel a wide range of emotions during a divorce – sadness, anger, confusion, and even relief. Acknowledge these feelings and allow yourself time to process them. Suppressing emotions can make the process harder.

2. Seek Support: Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can offer a listening ear or a comforting presence. Consider joining a support group for people going through similar experiences. Speaking with others who understand can provide comfort and advice.

3. Consult a Therapist: A professional therapist can help you navigate the emotional turmoil of a divorce. Therapy provides a safe space to express your feelings and gain coping strategies. Therapy can also help with rebuilding self-esteem and planning for the future.

4. Practice Self-care: Take time to focus on your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Exercise, hobbies, and mindfulness practices such as meditation can help relieve stress and improve your mood.

Preparing yourself emotionally and mentally ensures you are in a resilient state to handle the complexities of divorce more effectively.

Effective Communication with Your Ex-Partner

Effective communication with your ex-partner can significantly smooth out the divorce process. Whether discussing finances, child support, or property settlements, keeping communication clear and respectful is crucial.

1. Stay Calm and Respectful: It’s essential to keep your emotions in check during discussions. Avoid aggressive tones, hurtful language, or blaming. Aim to stay calm and focus on the issues at hand.

2. Set Boundaries: Establishing boundaries early on can prevent conflicts. Decide on the best ways to communicate, whether through emails, texts, or face-to-face meetings. Setting boundaries helps maintain respectful interactions.

3. Keep the Children in Mind: If you have children, make sure their well-being remains a central consideration. Avoid arguing or discussing adult issues in front of them. Communicate about their needs and schedule with patience and cooperation.

4. Use Neutral Language: Avoid using words that trigger conflicts. Neutral language can help convey your thoughts without escalating tensions. Aim to express yourself clearly and directly without being confrontational.

5. Seek Mediation if Needed: If you find it challenging to communicate directly with your ex-partner, consider mediation. A mediator can facilitate conversations and help both parties reach amicable agreements.

Effective communication can reduce misunderstandings, clear up confusion, and make the divorce process less stressful for everyone involved.

Legal Steps and Documentation Needed

Handling the legal steps and documentation during a divorce is crucial for ensuring a smooth process. Understanding what’s required can help you stay organised and avoid delays.

1. Filing for Divorce: The first step is filing an application for divorce with the Family Law Court. You’ll need to provide information about your marriage, living arrangements, and any children from the marriage.

2. Gather Necessary Documents: Important documents include your marriage certificate, financial statements, property deeds, and any other relevant paperwork. Organising these in advance can simplify the process.

3. Financial Disclosure: Both parties must provide a full disclosure of their financial situation. This includes income, expenses, assets, and debts. Transparency is key to a fair settlement.

4. Parenting Arrangements: If you have children, you need to arrange where they will live and how much time they will spend with each parent. Outline responsibilities for schooling, healthcare, and other aspects of their welfare.

5. Property and Financial Settlement: Decide how to divide marital property and debts. This can include your home, cars, superannuation, savings, and investments. Seek legal advice to ensure an equitable division.

6. Finalising the Divorce: Once all matters are resolved, the court will issue a divorce order, finalising the process. It’s important to comply with all court requirements and deadlines to avoid complications.

Understanding and following these steps can help you manage your divorce legally and efficiently.

Supporting Your Children Through the Process

Divorce can be a challenging time for children. Supporting them through this period is critical to their well-being and adjustment.

1. Communicate Openly: Talk to your children about the divorce in an age-appropriate manner. Answer their questions honestly and reassure them that both parents will continue to love and care for them.

2. Maintain Routine: Keeping a consistent daily routine can help children feel more secure. Stick to regular schedules for meals, school, and bedtime to provide stability.

3. Encourage Expression: Allow your children to express their feelings. Some may feel sad, angry, or confused. Listen to their concerns and validate their emotions.

4. Co-Parent Positively: Show a united front with your ex-partner when it comes to parenting. Avoid arguing or speaking negatively about them in front of the children. Positive co-parenting can provide a sense of normalcy.

5. Monitor Behavioural Changes: Be alert to any changes in your children’s behaviour that may indicate they are struggling. Signs can include withdrawal, academic issues, or changes in eating and sleeping patterns.

6. Seek Professional Help if Needed: Consider enlisting the help of a child psychologist or counsellor if your child has difficulty coping. Professional guidance can offer coping mechanisms and emotional support.

Supporting your children through a divorce ensures that they feel loved and secure despite the changes in their family structure.

Final Thoughts

Divorce is a complex and emotional process, but with the right approach, it can be managed smoothly. By preparing emotionally and mentally, maintaining effective communication with your ex-partner, following the necessary legal steps, and supporting your children, you can navigate this challenging time with greater ease.

At Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers, our divorce lawyers in Tugun are dedicated to helping you through every step of your divorce. Our experienced team provides compassionate and professional assistance to ensure you achieve a fair and positive outcome. Reach out to Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers today to find out how we can support you during your divorce journey.

Article, Articles, Blog, Divorce

Helping Your Kids During a Divorce

Divorce can be one of the most challenging experiences for a family, especially for children. The upheaval can leave kids feeling confused, scared, and uncertain about the future. As parents, it’s essential to guide them through this difficult time with sensitivity and care. Understanding their emotional needs and providing the right support can make a significant difference in how they cope with the changes.

Children may not always express their feelings openly, but they experience a wide range of emotions during a divorce. Anger, sadness, and anxiety are common, and it’s crucial for parents to acknowledge these feelings and offer reassurance. Kids need to know that both Mum and Dad will continue to love and care for them, even if the family structure is changing.

Effective communication and creating a stable environment can help kids feel secure and understood. Establishing routines and seeking professional help when needed also play a vital role in their adjustment. By addressing their emotional and practical needs, you can help your kids navigate the divorce with resilience and hope for the future.

Understanding Your Child’s Emotions During Divorce

Divorce can stir up a mix of emotions in children. Even if they don’t show it, they might be feeling a lot inside. As parents, recognising and understanding these feelings is crucial.

Children often feel confused and anxious. They may not understand why their family is changing. This uncertainty can lead to fears about the future, such as where they will live or whether they will still see both parents.

Children can also feel a sense of loss. They might grieve the family life they once knew. This can appear as sadness, crying, or withdrawing from activities they used to enjoy. Some kids might even blame themselves for the divorce, thinking if they behaved better, it wouldn’t have happened.

Anger is another common emotion. Kids might direct their anger at both parents or just one. They might show this anger through tantrums, acting out at school, or even getting into fights with siblings and friends.

Understanding these emotions means listening to your child and giving them space to express how they feel. Let them know it’s okay to be sad, angry, or confused. Reassure them that they are loved and that the divorce is not their fault. By acknowledging their feelings, you help them begin to process the changes in a healthy way.

Effective Communication Strategies with Your Kids

Talking to your kids about divorce can be tough. But good communication can make a big difference in how they cope. Here are some strategies to help.

Be Honest: Give them age-appropriate information about the divorce. Avoid sharing adult issues, but explain the situation clearly so they understand what’s happening.

Listen Actively: Let your kids share their thoughts and feelings. Don’t interrupt or dismiss their emotions. Listening shows you care and understand their feelings.

Reassure Them: Remind your child that both parents will always love them. Reiterate that the divorce is not their fault and that both Mum and Dad will continue to be involved in their lives.

Encourage Questions: Allow your kids to ask questions and answer them as honestly as you can. If you don’t have an answer, it’s okay to say you don’t know but will figure it out together.

Use Simple Language: Avoid legal jargon and complex terms. Use simple words to explain the changes they’ll experience.

Keep Communication Open: Let your kids know they can talk to you anytime. Maintain open lines of communication so they feel comfortable coming to you with their concerns.

By using these strategies, you can help your children feel secure and supported during the divorce. Good communication helps them understand what’s happening and feel more in control. It also builds trust and ensures they feel heard and valued during this challenging time.

Establishing Stability and Routine

Creating a stable environment during a divorce helps children feel secure and less anxious. Kids thrive on routine, so maintaining consistency is key.

Keep Regular Schedules: Stick to regular routines for meals, bedtime, and other daily activities. This continuity provides a sense of normalcy and predictability, which is comforting for children during times of change.

Consistent Discipline: Ensure that rules and discipline remain consistent between both parents’ homes. This helps children understand that the expectations haven’t changed and reduces confusion and anxiety.

Shared Activities: Continue family traditions and activities that your child enjoys. Whether it’s a weekly movie night or playing soccer in the park, these familiar activities can provide comfort and joy.

School and Extracurricular Stability: If possible, keep your child in the same school and continue their extracurricular activities. This continuity allows them to maintain friendships and interests, which are important for their emotional well-being.

By establishing stability and routine, you help your children navigate the changes in their family life with more confidence and less stress. Consistency reassures them that despite the changes, some things remain the same, fostering a sense of security and safety.

Seeking Professional Help and Resources

Sometimes, professional help is needed to support your children through a divorce. Don’t hesitate to reach out to experts who can provide additional guidance and assistance.

Counselling and Therapy: Professional counsellors or child psychologists can help your child express their feelings and develop healthy coping strategies. They provide a safe space for kids to talk about their emotions and fears.

School Resources: Many schools offer counselling services or have support staff who can work with children going through family changes. Informing teachers and school counsellors about the situation can help them provide extra support.

Support Groups: Joining a support group for children of divorced parents can be incredibly beneficial. It allows kids to connect with others who are experiencing similar situations, reducing feelings of isolation and providing peer support.

Books and Online Resources: There are many books and online resources designed to help children understand and cope with divorce. Reading together can open up conversations and help children feel less alone.

Family Mediators: If disagreements arise between parents, a family mediator can help resolve conflicts in a way that prioritises the child’s well-being. This can maintain a more harmonious co-parenting relationship.

Seeking professional help can make a significant difference in your child’s ability to handle the changes brought by divorce. Support and resources provide them with tools to manage their emotions and adapt to their new family dynamics.

Conclusion

Helping your kids through a divorce involves understanding their emotions, communicating effectively, establishing stability, and seeking professional support. By addressing their emotional and practical needs, you can guide them through this challenging time with love and care.

At Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers, we understand the complexities of family law in Brisbane and the impact divorce can have on children. Our team is dedicated to providing the compassionate and professional support you need to navigate this difficult period. If you’re seeking guidance on how to best support your children during a divorce, contact Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers today. Our experienced team is here to help you create a brighter, more stable future for your family.

Article, Blog, Divorce

Helping Kids Through a Divorce: Practical Advice

Divorce can be a difficult time for families, especially for children who may not fully understand what is happening. As parents, it’s essential to approach this situation with care and empathy. Helping your kids navigate the changes that come with divorce can significantly impact their emotional well-being and development.

Explaining Divorce to Your Children

Talking to your children about divorce can be challenging. They must understand what is happening in a way that suits their age and comprehension level. Here are some critical steps to take:

Be Honest and Clear: Use simple, direct language to explain that you and your partner will no longer live together. Avoid blaming each other or sharing unnecessary details. Ensure your children know that both parents decided to divorce and that it is final.
Reassure Them: Children might fear the divorce is their fault. Repeatedly reassure them that they are not to blame and that both parents love them unconditionally. Let them know that they will continue to see both parents and that their basic needs will be met.
Encourage Questions: Children will have questions about the changes ahead. Encourage them to ask questions and answer as honestly as you can. This can help them process the news and feel more secure about the future.
Choose the Right Time and Setting: Choose a calm moment to sit down as a family without distractions. This conversation should not be rushed. Allow plenty of time for your children to absorb the information and express their feelings.

Maintaining Stability and Routine

During a divorce, maintaining stability in your children’s lives is crucial. Consistent routines can provide them with a sense of security and normalcy. Here’s how you can keep stability:

Keep Normal Schedules: Stick to regular daily routines such as mealtimes, bedtimes, and school activities. This predictability can be comforting for children. If both parents share custody, try to align house rules and schedules as closely as possible to avoid confusion.
Communicate Openly about Changes: If your routine changes, like moving to a new home or changing schools, explain these changes in advance. Give your children time to adjust to the idea and reassure them that their basic needs and activities will remain consistent.
Involve Them in Decision-Making: Depending on their age, involve your children in small decisions. This could be as simple as choosing their room’s decoration in the new home. Feeling included can empower them and make them more comfortable with the changes.
Consistency in Discipline: Maintain consistent discipline and behavioural expectations between households. This consistency helps children understand what is expected of them and provides a stable environment, reducing anxiety and improving their ability to adapt to changes.

These practices will help your children feel secure and less anxious during the divorce transition. A stable and predictable environment can significantly ease their adjustment period.

Co-Parenting Strategies for a Healthy Relationship

Effective co-parenting after a divorce is essential for your child’s well-being. A cooperative and respectful relationship between parents can make the transition smoother for everyone involved. Here are some strategies for successful co-parenting:

Communicate Openly and Respectfully: Keep communication clear, concise, and focused on your child’s needs. Avoid discussing personal issues or conflicts in front of your child. Use a calm tone and be respectful, even if disagreements arise.
Create a Parenting Plan: Develop a detailed parenting plan that outlines custody arrangements, visitation schedules, holidays, and decision-making responsibilities. This helps both parents understand their roles and reduces the potential for conflict.
Be Consistent with Rules and Discipline: Agree on fundamental rules and disciplinary actions to be maintained in both households. Consistency helps your child feel secure and understand what is expected of them, regardless of which parent they are with.
Attend Co-Parenting Counselling: If communication is difficult, consider attending co-parenting counselling. A counsellor can provide strategies and techniques to improve your co-parenting relationship and ensure the best outcomes for your child.
Support Each Other’s Relationship with the Child: Encourage your child to spend quality time with the other parent and support that relationship. Avoid negative comments about your co-parent in front of the child, which can create stress and confusion.

Implementing these strategies can help build a healthy co-parenting relationship, ensuring your child receives consistent care and support from both parents.

Supporting Your Child’s Emotional Wellbeing

Your child’s emotional well-being is paramount during and after a divorce. Children may experience a range of emotions, and it’s crucial to provide the proper support to help them cope. Here are some ways to support their emotional health:

Encourage Open Communication: Create a safe space for your child to express feelings and thoughts. Let them know feeling sad, angry, or confused is okay. Validate their emotions and offer comfort and reassurance.
Be Patient and Understanding: Your child may have behavioural changes as they adjust to the new family dynamics. Be patient and understanding, offering consistent love and support. Address any issues calmly and constructively.
Seek Professional Help If Needed: If your child struggles to cope with the divorce, consider seeking help from a child psychologist or counsellor. Professional support can give your child tools and techniques to manage their emotions effectively.
Promote Positive Activities: Encourage your child to engage in enjoyable and fulfilling activities. Sports, hobbies, and social activities can provide a healthy outlet for their emotions and help them build resilience.
Stay Involved in Their Lives: Show interest in your child’s daily activities, school life, and friendships. Being actively involved helps your child feel valued and supported, fostering a sense of normalcy and stability.

Conclusion

Divorce can be a challenging experience for children, but with the right approach, parents can help their kids navigate this transition more smoothly. By explaining the divorce clearly, maintaining stability, practising effective co-parenting, and supporting their emotional well-being, you can create a nurturing environment for your child.

At Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers, we understand families’ difficulties during divorce. Our divorce lawyers in Tugun can provide guidance and support, ensuring the best interests of your children are always prioritised. If you need legal advice or support during your divorce, contact Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers today. We are here to help you and your family through this difficult time.

Article, Blog, Divorce

Divorce in Australia Made Simple for Families

Divorce can be a complex and emotional journey, especially for families. Understanding the process, what needs to be done, and how to protect your interests can make this difficult time a bit easier. In Australia, there are specific steps and requirements that must be followed for a divorce to be granted, and knowing these can help make the path smoother for everyone involved.

This guide aims to provide a clear and concise overview of the divorce process in Australia, making it simpler for families to understand and navigate. By breaking down each aspect, we hope to offer valuable insights and lessen the emotional toll of divorce.

Understanding the Divorce Process in Australia

Divorce in Australia starts with the legal process of filing for a divorce order. This step requires you to prove that your marriage has broken down irretrievably. A separation period of at least 12 months is required before you can apply for a divorce. You don’t need to prove fault or blame anyone; the focus is on the fact that the marriage has ended.

To begin, you will need to complete an Application for Divorce, available on the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia website. This application can be completed individually or jointly with your spouse. If you apply on your own, you will need to serve the divorce papers to your spouse, providing them with the necessary documents and time to respond.

Once the application is filed, a court hearing will be scheduled. If there are no children under 18, you may not be required to attend the hearing. However, if there are children involved, the court will need to be satisfied that proper arrangements have been made for their care, welfare, and development.

After the court grants the divorce, it becomes final one month and one day later once the order has been issued. It’s important to remember that divorce pertains only to the dissolution of the marriage and does not cover issues related to property settlement or child custody, which need to be addressed separately.

Navigating Property Settlements: What You Need to Know

Property settlements can be one of the more complex aspects of the divorce process. It involves dividing assets, debts, and property acquired during the marriage. The aim is to reach a fair and equitable division, taking into account various factors.

Firstly, list all assets and liabilities. This includes the family home, cars, savings, investments, superannuation, and any debts. It’s important to have a complete picture of all financial matters to ensure nothing is overlooked.

Next, the court considers several factors to determine the division. These include the financial contributions of each party, non-financial contributions such as homemaking and child-rearing, and the future needs of both parties. For example, if one spouse has primary custody of the children, their need for stable housing and financial support will be taken into account.

If both parties can agree on the division of property, the agreement can be formalised through Consent Orders, which are then filed with the court. If an agreement cannot be reached, the matter may need to be resolved through mediation or by the court.

It’s essential to finalise property settlements within 12 months of the divorce being finalised. Understanding the steps and legal requirements can help you navigate property settlements more smoothly, ensuring a fair outcome for everyone involved.

Child Support and Custody: Ensuring Your Child’s Best Interests

When going through a divorce, ensuring that your child’s best interests are prioritised is crucial. Understanding how child support and custody arrangements work can make a big difference.

Child Support: Child support is designed to help cover the costs of raising your child. The amount paid depends on several factors, including the incomes of both parents, the number of children, and the amount of time each parent spends with the child. The Department of Human Services (DHS) manages child support assessments and can help calculate the appropriate amount. It’s important to keep these payments up-to-date to ensure your child’s needs are met.

Child Custody: Legal custody involves making major decisions about the child’s life, such as education, healthcare, and religious upbringing. Physical custody refers to where the child lives. In Australia, the Family Law Act emphasises the child’s right to have a meaningful relationship with both parents as long as it’s in the child’s best interest.

Creating a parenting plan can help outline custody arrangements. This plan should include where the child will live, visitation schedules, holidays, and any specific needs. If an agreement cannot be reached, the court will make a decision based on what is best for the child, considering factors like the child’s wishes, the relationship with each parent, and any history of family violence.

Legal Protections and Support for Families

Families undergoing divorce or separation need access to legal protections and support services. These resources are essential in dealing with various issues like domestic violence, property settlements and ensuring the well-being of everyone involved.

Family Violence: If there’s any history of domestic violence, immediate safety and protection are vital. Intervention orders, also known as protection orders, can offer legal protection. These orders can restrict the behaviour of the person who is being violent. Contacting the police, a lawyer, or support services can provide immediate help.

Legal Aid: For those concerned about legal costs, legal aid can offer assistance. They provide legal services to those who cannot afford a private lawyer. This includes advice, representation, and support through the court process.

Counselling and Support Services: Emotional support is just as important as legal support. Counselling services can help families manage the stress and emotional toll of divorce. Many organisations offer free or low-cost counselling to help both parents and children cope with the changes.

Community Resources: Various community services can provide practical help, such as housing support, financial counselling, and parenting workshops. Utilising these resources can help families navigate the complexities of divorce and separation more smoothly.

By leveraging these legal protections and support services, families can feel more secure and supported throughout the divorce process.

Conclusion

Navigating divorce involves understanding the legal processes, making fair property settlements, ensuring child support and custody arrangements, and accessing essential legal protections and support services. Each step of this journey is crucial in providing stability and care for all family members involved.

For expert guidance through every step of your divorce, reach out to us at Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers today. Our experienced team of divorce lawyers in Kirra is here to support you in securing the best possible outcome for your family.

Article, Blog, Divorce

How to Navigate Divorce in Australia: A Simple Guide

Divorce can be challenging, filled with strong emotions and difficult decisions. In Australia, there is a clear legal process that needs to be followed to ensure everything is handled properly. Understanding this process can help make the journey a bit smoother and less stressful.

In this guide, we will walk you through the necessary steps and provide important information on filing for divorce, dividing property, arranging child support, and addressing any issues related to domestic violence. By breaking it down into simple terms, we aim to make this complex process easier to understand.

Understanding the Divorce Process in Australia

Steps to Filing for Divorce

Filing for divorce in Australia begins with applying with the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia. You may apply alone (sole application) or with your spouse (joint application). First, ensure you meet the criteria for divorce, such as being separated for at least 12 months. Then, fill out the application form, pay the filing fee, and submit the required documents. You will also need to serve your spouse with the divorce papers if it is a sole application.

Legal Requirements and Eligibility

To be eligible for divorce in Australia, you or your spouse must be an Australian citizen, live in Australia, or consider Australia your permanent home. The court must be convinced that the marriage has broken down irreparably and that there is no chance of reconciliation. If you have children under 18, the court must also ensure proper arrangements are in place for their care, welfare, and development.

Time Frames and Waiting Periods

When you file for divorce, there is a mandatory waiting period of at least one month and one day from the date of filing until the court can grant a divorce order. After the order is made, it becomes final one month and one day later, at which point you are officially divorced. Prepare for these waiting periods to avoid delays in finalising your divorce.

Documentation and Court Procedures

The required documents include your marriage certificate and, if necessary, a translation if it’s not in English. You may also need affidavits and written proof of arrangements for your children. Once filed, the court reviews your application and, if everything is in order, schedules a hearing. In some cases, you may not need to attend the hearing, especially in joint applications where there are no children involved.

Dividing Property and Assets Equitably

What is Considered Marital Property?

Marital property includes all assets and debts acquired during the marriage, regardless of whose name they are in. This may include the family home, savings, investments, superannuation, and personal items like cars and jewellery. It also covers debts such as mortgages, loans, and credit card balances. Identifying all assets and liabilities is the first step in dividing property.

The Role of Financial Disclosure

Both parties need to provide full and honest disclosure of all financial information. This helps ensure a fair division of assets. Financial disclosure includes providing bank statements, property valuations, tax returns, and a list of all other assets and debts. Transparency is crucial to avoid disputes and ensure a smooth settlement process.

Ensuring Child Support and Custody Arrangements

Determining Child Custody

Determining child custody is crucial for the well-being of your kids. In Australia, the court prioritises what’s best for the children. There are several types of custody arrangements, including sole custody, where one parent has full responsibility, and joint custody, where both parents share responsibilities. The court considers factors like the child’s relationship with each parent, each parent’s ability to care for the child, and the child’s own wishes. Creating a parenting plan can help clarify these arrangements and make sure everyone agrees.

Calculating Child Support Payments

Child support is the financial help one parent provides to the other to cover children’s living costs. The amount is calculated using a formula that considers both parents’ incomes, the children’s needs, and the amount of time the child spends with each parent. The Department of Human Services manages child support payments and ensures they are fair and adequate. It’s important to keep records of all payments and adjust them as financial circumstances change.

Legal Rights and Responsibilities of Parents

Parents have both rights and responsibilities when it comes to their children. These include the right to see your child and the responsibility to support them financially and emotionally. It’s essential to ensure that your actions always reflect your child’s best interests. The Family Law Act 1975 outlines these duties and provides guidelines for how they should be met. Knowing your legal obligations can help you make the best decisions for your child.

Addressing Domestic Violence During Divorce

Recognising Domestic Violence

Domestic violence can take many forms, including physical, emotional, and financial abuse. Recognising the signs is the first step in seeking help. This can include physical threats, controlling behaviour, or emotional manipulation. It’s important to understand that domestic violence is not your fault and that help is available. Speaking out and seeking advice can be powerful steps towards safety.

Legal Protections and Restraining Orders

Australia’s legal system offers protections for those experiencing domestic violence. You can apply for an Apprehended Violence Order (AVO), which can restrict the abuser from contacting you, coming near you, or harassing you. The Family Law Act also provides measures to protect children from exposure to family violence. Knowing your rights and how to access these protective measures can make a significant difference.

Accessing Support Services

Various support services are available for those facing domestic violence. These include helplines, counselling services, and emergency shelters. Organisations like 1800RESPECT and Lifeline offer confidential advice and support. Reaching out to these services can provide immediate help and long-term solutions to ensure your safety and well-being.

Conclusion

Divorce is undoubtedly a challenging journey, but understanding the process can make it easier to navigate. By knowing the steps to file for divorce, how to divide property and assets, and making clear arrangements for child support and custody, you can avoid many pitfalls. It’s also crucial to recognise and address any issues of domestic violence, ensuring you and your children are safe throughout the process.

If you need help navigating your divorce, our divorce lawyers in Gold Coast at Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers are here to offer expert guidance and support. Contact us to ensure you get the legal assistance you need to move forward with confidence and security.

Blog, Child Custody, Child Support, Divorce

Guide to Divorce for Aussie Families in 2024

Going through a divorce is never easy, but understanding the process can help manage the journey better. Whether you’re considering a divorce or already going through one, knowing the legal requirements and steps involved can make a significant difference. The goal is to reach a fair and equitable resolution while minimising stress for all involved, especially children.

In Australia, divorce involves more than just ending a marriage. It includes property settlement, child custody arrangements, and financial support. Each of these aspects requires careful consideration and, often, negotiation. The legal system aims to ensure that both parties walk away with a fair share, while the best interests of the children remain a priority.

Navigating the emotional and practical challenges of divorce can be overwhelming. Thankfully, various support services and strategies can help you cope with the stress and make informed decisions throughout the process. By staying informed and seeking the necessary support, you can better manage the complexities of divorce and focus on starting the next chapter of your life.

Understanding the Divorce Process in Australia

1. Legal Requirements for Divorce

Before you can file for divorce in Australia, you must meet specific legal requirements. Firstly, you need to be legally married and have proof of marriage, such as a marriage certificate. Secondly, you must show that your marriage has broken down irretrievably, which means there is no chance of getting back together.

This usually requires a separation of at least 12 months. Australian law also requires at least one spouse to regard Australia as their permanent home, be an Australian citizen, or ordinarily live in Australia and have done so for at least 12 months before applying.

2. Steps to File for Divorce

Filing for divorce involves a few straightforward steps. First, obtain an application for divorce from the Family Court website. Fill out the application, noting all required details about your marriage and separation. Once completed, file the application with the Family Court and pay the required fees.

If you have children under 18, you will need to attend a divorce hearing. If the application is joint, there’s no need for a court appearance. The court will review your application, and if everything is in order, they will grant a divorce order, which becomes final one month and one day after the hearing.

3. Timeline and Processing

The processing time for a divorce application can vary, but on average, it takes about four months from filing the application to the finalisation of the divorce order. This includes the mandatory separation period of 12 months prior to filing. After submitting your application, it typically takes several weeks for the court to process the paperwork and schedule any necessary hearings.

Once the divorce order is granted, a one-month waiting period ensues before the divorce is officially finalised. Being aware of this timeline helps in planning for post-divorce arrangements, such as property settlements and child custody.

Key Considerations for Property Settlement

1. Identifying and Valuing Assets

One of the first steps in a property settlement is identifying and valuing all assets. This process includes gathering information on real estate, bank accounts, investments, superannuation, personal belongings, and any other property.

Accurately valuing these assets is crucial for a fair division. Sometimes, hiring professional appraisers or accountants might be necessary to get precise valuations. This ensures that both parties have a clear understanding of what needs to be divided.

2. Negotiating Settlements

Negotiating a property settlement involves discussions between both parties to reach an agreement on how to divide assets and liabilities. This process can be amicable or contentious, depending on the circumstances. It’s essential to approach this with a clear understanding of your rights and contributions during the marriage.

Mediation can be a helpful tool in negotiations, providing a neutral third-party mediator to facilitate discussions and help reach a fair agreement. Open communication and a willingness to compromise can often lead to a more satisfactory outcome for both parties.

3. Legal Protections and Rights

When it comes to property settlements, knowing your legal protections and rights is vital. The Family Law Act provides a framework for fair division, considering factors like each partner’s contributions, future needs, and the length of the marriage. Legal advice can help you understand these rights and navigate the settlement process effectively.

If negotiations fail, court intervention may become necessary. Courts have the authority to make binding decisions to ensure a just division of property, protecting both parties’ interests. Understanding your legal protections can provide peace of mind and ensure a fair outcome.

Managing Child Support and Custody

1. Determining Custody Arrangements

When a couple divorces, one of the most crucial issues to resolve is child custody. Determining who the children will live with and how much time they will spend with each parent can be challenging. Factors such as each parent’s living situation, their relationship with the child, and the child’s needs are considered. Courts always focus on the best interests of the child, aiming to ensure a stable and loving environment for them.

2. Calculating Child Support Payments

Child support payments are essential for covering the expenses needed to raise a child. The amount of child support is calculated based on each parent’s income, the number of children, and the custody arrangement. The Child Support Agency (CSA) provides guidelines to help determine the correct payment amounts. Ensuring that child support is fair and sufficient helps to meet the child’s needs and maintain their standard of living.

3. Navigating Dispute Resolution

Disagreements over child support and custody can be stressful. It’s vital to have a plan for resolving these disputes. Mediation can be an effective way to reach an agreement without going to court.

In mediation, a neutral third party helps both parents discuss their concerns and find a solution. If mediation doesn’t work, the court can make a binding decision. Knowing the options for dispute resolution can make the process less daunting and help find a satisfactory outcome for everyone involved.

Emotional and Practical Support During Divorce

1. Strategies for Coping with Stress

Divorce is a stressful and emotional time. It’s essential to find strategies to cope with this stress. Regular exercise, healthy eating, and maintaining a routine can help keep you grounded. Talking to friends, family, or a counsellor can provide emotional support. Finding ways to relax and take care of yourself is crucial during this difficult period.

2. Support Services Available

Numerous support services are available to help you through a divorce. Legal aid services can provide guidance on your rights and responsibilities. Community organisations offer support groups for emotional help. Financial advisors can assist with planning your post-divorce finances. Accessing these services can make the divorce process smoother and less overwhelming.

3. Helping Children Through the Process

Children can find divorce particularly challenging. Helping them understand what’s happening and providing constant support is vital. Keep open lines of communication and reassure them it’s not their fault.

Trying to maintain a routine can provide consistency and security. Seeking professional help, like child counselling, can also be beneficial. Supporting your children through this time is crucial for their emotional well-being.

Understanding the Divorce Process in Australia

Going through a divorce involves numerous legal, emotional, and practical challenges. Each step, from understanding the legal process and negotiating property settlements to managing child support and custody, requires careful consideration and planning. Being informed and prepared can help ease the stress and ensure a fair outcome for everyone involved.

If you are facing a divorce and need expert legal support from the best divorce lawyers on the Gold Coast, contact Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers. Our team specialises in family law and matrimonial property settlements, offering the guidance and support needed to achieve a fair and equitable resolution!

Articles, Blog, Divorce, Domestic Violence

Dealing with Domestic Violence During a Divorce

Divorce can be a tumultuous and emotionally charged process, but when domestic violence is involved, the stakes are even higher. Recognising the signs of abuse, taking immediate action to ensure your safety, and understanding your legal rights are crucial steps in protecting yourself and your loved ones during this difficult transition.

So, we’ll explore the various forms of domestic violence, outline practical strategies for securing your well-being, and provide a roadmap for long-term recovery and empowerment. Whether you’re currently facing an abusive situation or are concerned about the potential for violence, we’ll equip you with the knowledge and resources to navigate the complexities of divorce and domestic violence with confidence and resilience.

Recognising Signs of Domestic Violence

1. Isolating Nature

Domestic violence isn’t always easy to spot. Common signs include physical injuries, such as bruises or cuts, that can’t be easily explained. If you find yourself being isolated from friends and family, this is another red flag.

Excessive jealousy or possessiveness, constant monitoring, and controlling behaviours are also typical signs. It’s important to pay attention to these indications, as they can be the first step towards seeking help.

2. Emotional and Psychological Abuse

Emotional and psychological abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse. This type of abuse can include constant criticism, belittling, and name-calling. It often involves manipulating your self-worth and making you feel isolated or worthless.

Gaslighting, where the abuser makes you question your perception of reality, is also common. Recognising these patterns is vital for understanding the full extent of the abuse and taking appropriate action.

3. Physical and Financial Control

Physical control can involve direct harm, threats of violence, or destruction of personal property. Financial control, on the other hand, involves limiting your access to money, taking control of your finances, or preventing you from working. Both forms of control aim to dominate and destabilise you. Understanding these aspects can help you see the bigger picture and motivate you to seek the help you need.

Steps to Ensure Immediate Safety

1. Creating a Safety Plan

Creating a safety plan is a crucial step in ensuring your immediate safety. This plan should include a list of emergency contacts, safe places you can go, and items you need to take with you if you leave suddenly. Think about essential documents, medications, and some cash. Keep your phone charged and know emergency numbers by heart. Having a clear plan in place can help you act quickly when necessary.

2. Seeking Temporary Accommodation

Finding a safe place to stay is critical. This could be with a trusted friend or family member, or at a domestic violence shelter. Shelters provide immediate safety, basic necessities, and emotional support during a very difficult time. They also have resources and professionals who can guide you through the next steps. Knowing where you can go gives you the strength to leave an abusive situation.

Contacting Authorities and Support Services

Reaching out to authorities and support services can provide immediate help and long-term solutions. Contacting the police can offer immediate protection and start the process of legal action. Support services provide counselling, financial assistance, and legal advice.

In Australia, services like 1800RESPECT offer 24-hour support and can help you find local resources. Taking this step ensures you’re not facing this challenge alone and can make a significant difference in your safety.

Legal Measures to Protect Yourself

1. Applying for a Protection Order

A protection order can provide immediate relief from an abusive situation. This legal document restricts the abuser from contacting or approaching you. You can apply for one at your local court or with help from a legal aid office.

Judges typically issue these orders based on the evidence presented, so it’s important to document instances of abuse. A protection order can also include provisions for your children’s safety, ensuring a secure environment for them as well.

2. Legal Rights During a Divorce

Understanding your legal rights during a divorce is crucial, especially when domestic violence is involved. You have the right to a safe living environment and to protect your assets. The Family Law Act provides protections for those experiencing domestic violence, including measures to expedite custody and property settlement proceedings. Knowing your rights empowers you to take the necessary steps to safeguard your well-being and that of your children.

3. Accessing Legal Aid and Support

Legal aid services offer assistance to those unable to afford private legal representation. These services can help you apply for protection orders, navigate custody disputes, and secure property settlements. Free or low-cost legal advice is invaluable during this challenging time.

You can find legal aid offices in most communities, and many domestic violence shelters can connect you with legal resources. Taking advantage of these services ensures you get the support you need to move forward.

Long-Term Support and Recovery

1. Accessing Counselling and Support Groups

Long-term recovery from domestic violence often involves counselling and support groups. These resources provide a safe space to discuss your experiences and feelings. Counselling can help you process the trauma and develop coping strategies. Support groups offer community and understanding from others who have experienced similar challenges. Accessing these resources is vital for emotional recovery and rebuilding your self-esteem.

2. Financial Independence and Recovery

Achieving financial independence is an important step in recovering from domestic violence. Start by assessing your current financial situation and making a budget. Seek employment or training opportunities to increase your financial stability. Some organisations offer financial counselling and assistance to help you regain control. Building financial independence helps you to feel more secure and in control of your future.

3. Rebuilding Life Post-Divorce and Violence

Rebuilding your life after divorce and domestic violence takes time and effort. Set small, achievable goals for yourself, whether that’s finding a new home, returning to school, or starting a new job. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can offer encouragement and assistance. Focus on self-care and activities that bring you joy. As you start to rebuild, remember that recovery is a journey, and it’s okay to seek help along the way.

Rebuilding Your Life After Domestic Violence and Divorce: A Roadmap to Empowerment

Dealing with domestic violence during a divorce is a daunting challenge, but it is possible to navigate this difficult time with the right support and resources. Recognising the signs of abuse, ensuring your immediate safety, and taking legal measures are essential steps.

Moving forward, long-term recovery involves accessing counselling, achieving financial independence, and rebuilding your life. Remember, each step you take brings you closer to a future free from violence and full of hope.

At Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers, we understand the complexities involved in such cases. Our dedicated team is here to guide you through the process and provide the support you need. Contact our domestic violence lawyers in Brisbane today to start your journey to safety and recovery.

Article, Blog, Divorce

Helping Kids Cope with Divorce: Useful Tips for Parents

Divorce can be a challenging experience for everyone in the family, especially children. The emotional upheaval and changes in routine can create a sense of uncertainty and anxiety for kids. As parents, it is crucial to understand how divorce impacts your children and to provide the support they need during this difficult time.

Children often have a hard time understanding why their parents are separating and may feel confused or scared about the changes. They might worry about losing one of their parents or feel responsible for the breakup. Being mindful of these emotional responses is essential in helping them cope better.

Creating an environment where children feel safe and reassured is key. This involves open communication, consistent routines, and an emphasis on their well-being. By addressing their concerns and demonstrating that both parents are still there for them, you can help ease their anxiety and foster resilience.

Understanding the Emotional Impact of Divorce on Children

Divorce can be a confusing and painful experience for children. They may feel a range of emotions such as sadness, anger, guilt, and fear. It’s important for parents to recognise these feelings and address them.

Children often worry about their future and what the divorce will mean for their family. They might fear losing one parent or worry that they caused the breakup. Younger kids may not understand the full implications, while older ones might become angry or withdrawn.

Being mindful of these emotional impacts helps in providing the right support. Show your children that their feelings are valid and that it’s okay to talk about them. Reassure them that both parents still love them and will continue to care for them. Listening to their concerns without judgment can help them feel understood and secure.

Effective Communication Strategies with Kids During Divorce

Dos and Don’ts of Discussing Divorce

When talking to kids about divorce, how you communicate is crucial. Here are some dos and don’ts to keep in mind:

– Do be honest: Use simple, clear language. Explain that the divorce is not their fault and that both parents still love them.

– Do listen: Allow them to express their feelings and ask questions. Be patient and empathetic in your responses.

– Don’t blame the other parent: Avoid speaking negatively about your ex. Negative comments can make children feel torn between their parents.

– Don’t overload with details: Share necessary information without overwhelming them with adult issues.

Age-Appropriate Explanations

Tailoring your explanation to your child’s age can help them understand better:

– Young Children (Age 3-5): Use simple words like “Mummy and Daddy won’t be living together anymore, but we both love you very much.”

– School-Age Children (Age 6-12): Provide a bit more detail. Explain changes in living arrangements and reassure them of routine stability.

– Teenagers (Age 13-18): Be more upfront about the reasons for divorce. Acknowledge their capacity for deeper understanding and involve them in discussions about future plans.

Using these strategies helps make the conversation about divorce less stressful for children and fosters a trusting and supportive environment.

Co-Parenting Tips for Stability

Creating Consistency in Both Homes

Consistency is key to providing stability for children during a divorce. It helps them feel secure and understand that some parts of their life will stay the same. Here are some tips to create consistency across both households:

– Set Similar Rules and Routines: Work with your co-parent to establish similar rules and routines in both homes. This includes bedtime, homework schedules, and disciplinary actions.

– Keep Their Schedule Predictable: Make sure your children know when and where they will be with each parent. A regular visitation schedule can help reduce anxiety.

– Share Important Information: Communicate with your co-parent about the child’s needs, school events, and medical appointments to ensure that everyone is on the same page.

Having a predictable and consistent environment in both homes can ease the child’s transition and provide a sense of normalcy.

Handling Conflicts Respectfully

Disagreements between parents are common, but handling them respectfully is crucial for the children’s well-being:

– Keep Conflicts Private: Never argue in front of your children. Address any disagreements privately or through mediation if necessary.

– Be Respectful: Speak respectfully about the other parent when your children are present. Negative comments can confuse and upset them.

– Maintain Focus on the Children: Ensure that all decisions and actions are made with the child’s best interests in mind. This can include joint decisions on education, health, and extracurricular activities.

Handling conflicts respectfully helps in creating a supportive environment, fostering cooperation and reducing stress for children.

Supporting Your Child’s Mental Health

Recognising Signs of Stress or Anxiety

Divorce can trigger stress and anxiety in children, and recognising these signs early is essential:

– Changes in Behaviour: Look out for changes like withdrawal from friends and activities, aggression, or clinginess.

– Academic Performance: A sudden drop in grades or lack of interest in school can be a sign of stress.

– Physical Symptoms: Complaints of headaches, stomach aches, or other stress-related illnesses should be taken seriously.

Recognising these signs early allows you to address them and provide the necessary support to your child.

Seeking Professional Help if Needed

Sometimes, children may need additional support to cope with their feelings about the divorce. Seeking professional help can be beneficial:

– Counselling: A child psychologist or counsellor can provide a safe space for children to express their feelings and develop coping strategies.

– Support Groups: Joining a support group with other children who are going through similar experiences can help your child feel less alone.

– Educational Resources: Books and educational materials about divorce can help explain the situation in an age-appropriate way.

Utilising professional resources ensures that your child receives the emotional support they need during this challenging time.

Conclusion

Divorce is a significant change that affects every member of a family, especially children. Understanding their emotional needs, maintaining open and effective communication, creating stability through co-parenting, and supporting their mental health are crucial steps in helping kids adjust. Every child’s experience is unique, so it’s essential to remain patient and provide personalized support suited to their needs.

At Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers, we are dedicated to helping families navigate the complexities of divorce with compassion and expertise. If you need guidance or support during this difficult time, contact our divorce lawyers on the Gold Coast for professional advice and assistance. Together, we can work towards a stable and supportive future for your children.

Article, Blog, Divorce

Essential Steps to Navigate Divorce in Australia Effectively

Going through a divorce is never easy, but understanding the process can make it more manageable. In Australia, the steps to getting a divorce are straightforward once you know what’s involved. Whether you’re just starting to consider divorce or are already in the midst of it, having a clear plan can help you navigate this challenging time.

Handling a divorce involves more than just filing paperwork. It requires emotional and financial preparation, as well as an understanding of legal requirements. From dividing property to arranging child custody, each step needs careful consideration to ensure a fair outcome.

Having the right information and support can make a world of difference. By understanding the legal steps, preparing yourself emotionally and financially, and knowing when to seek professional help, you can handle your divorce more smoothly. Let’s explore the key steps to handling a divorce in Australia in 2024, making the process as straightforward as possible.

Understanding the Legal Requirements for Divorce

In Australia, getting a divorce means ending a legal marriage. The process starts with understanding and meeting the legal requirements. First, you must be separated from your spouse for at least 12 months. This separation can occur while still living under the same roof, but you’ll need additional evidence to prove this.

You must also show that the marriage has broken down irretrievably. This means there is no reasonable chance of reconciliation. When applying for a divorce, you’ll need to file an application with the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia.

The application involves completing forms and providing necessary documents, like your marriage certificate. If you have children, the court will need to be satisfied that proper arrangements have been made for their care, welfare, and development. This ensures that the children’s best interests are prioritised during and after the divorce.

Preparing Financially and Emotionally for Divorce

Gathering Financial Documents

Being organised financially is crucial in a divorce. Start by gathering all relevant financial documents. This includes bank statements, tax returns, pay slips, mortgage documents, and superannuation statements. Having these on hand can help you understand your financial situation and prepare for the property settlement process.

Organise these documents in a way that makes them easily accessible. This can be through digital copies stored securely on your computer or physical copies in a binder. Keeping everything in one place will save time and reduce stress when you need to reference these documents.

Building a Support System

Emotional preparation is just as important as financial preparation. Building a strong support system can help you handle the emotional challenges of divorce. Reach out to friends and family members who can offer support and understanding during this time.

Professional support can also be beneficial. Consider talking to a therapist or counsellor who specialises in divorce. They can provide strategies to cope with your emotions and help you adjust to the changes in your life. Online support groups can also offer comfort and advice from others going through similar experiences.

Divorce can be a difficult journey, but with the right preparation, you can manage the process more smoothly and ensure you come out stronger on the other side.

Navigating Property Settlement and Child Custody

Dividing Assets Fairly

During a divorce, dividing assets can be a daunting task. The goal is to reach a fair and equitable distribution, considering both parties’ contributions and future needs. Start by listing all assets, including properties, cars, bank accounts, investments, and superannuation. Both marital and individual properties should be included for a comprehensive view.

Next, assess the value of each asset. For significant items like homes or businesses, consider hiring professional valuers. This provides an accurate financial picture, ensuring a fair division. Don’t forget to account for debts and liabilities. These should be disclosed and split in a manner that reflects the overall fairness of the settlement.

By approaching the division with transparency and fairness, you can avoid lengthy disputes and reach an agreement that reflects both parties’ needs.

Making Child Custody Arrangements

Child custody arrangements are crucial to ensure the well-being of children involved in a divorce. Focus on creating a plan that prioritises the child’s best interests. This includes their emotional, physical, and educational needs. When creating a custody plan, consider factors like the child’s routine, schooling, and relationship with each parent.

Open communication between both parents is key to forming an effective arrangement. Discuss visitation schedules, holidays, and special occasions. Try to be flexible and accommodating to each other’s schedules and commitments. Mediation can be a helpful tool in resolving disagreements and creating a workable custody plan.

Ensure that any custody arrangement is documented and approved by the court. This provides a legal framework for the agreement, protecting everyone’s interests.

Seeking Professional Help and Legal Advice

Choosing a Family Lawyer

Getting the right legal help is crucial in navigating a divorce smoothly. A family lawyer specialises in divorce and property settlements and can provide valuable guidance throughout the process. Start by researching and seeking recommendations for experienced family lawyers within your area.

When selecting a lawyer, consider their expertise, communication style, and client reviews. Schedule a consultation to discuss your case and assess if they are a good fit. A good family lawyer will help clarify legal terms, provide advice tailored to your situation, and represent your interests in negotiations or court, if necessary.

Having a knowledgeable and compassionate lawyer can make a significant difference in achieving a favourable outcome.

Considering Mediation and Counselling Options

Engaging in mediation and counselling can ease the divorce process. Mediation involves a neutral third party who helps both spouses negotiate and reach an agreement amicably. This can be particularly effective in resolving disputes over property and child custody, saving time and legal costs.

Counselling is also beneficial for emotional support. It provides a space to express feelings, process the changes, and find strategies to cope with the stress of divorce. Family counselling can assist in managing the impact on children and improving communication between parents.

Exploring these options helps create a supportive framework, ensuring a more manageable and less adversarial divorce process.

Conclusion

Handling a divorce requires careful planning and a clear understanding of the legal steps involved. From meeting the legal requirements and preparing financially and emotionally, to navigating property settlements and child custody, each step is crucial for a smooth process.

Seeking professional help, whether through a family lawyer or mediation, can significantly ease the journey. By being informed and prepared, you can manage your divorce effectively and move forward with confidence. Remember, the goal is to achieve a fair resolution that considers everyone’s best interests.

For expert advice and support tailored to your unique situation, contact Hooper & Mill Family Lawyers today. Let our divorce lawyers on the Gold Coast help you through every step of your divorce to ensure a fair and smooth outcome.

Articles written by Peter Hooper, Divorce

Divorce in Australia – What does it mean in 2021? – Does our society still value marriage?

There’s no doubt 2020 has been a difficult year. I don’t need to state the obvious or recap on what everyone already knows.

I personally know how hard 2020 was for many people because in the latter half of 2020 my practice has been really busy and many other family lawyers in Brisbane and on the Gold Coast have told me they are in the same boat.

My belief is that as family lawyers we are in the business of “damage control”. Our role is to help minimise the inevitable damage relationship breakdown creates financially, for children, in terms of our society, and I think many of my colleagues would feel the same way. It’s understandable that people feel cynical about lawyers and the law, it’s confusing, expensive and painful.

Prevention is better than cure

One of the first things any good family lawyer should discuss with you is prospects for reconciliation.

Frankly this is the best resolution possible. No legal fees, no halving your net worth, no seeing your children according to a schedule.

It’s better for society as well. Children grow up to be better adults in homes free from conflict with two parents, the social security system is less likely to be called upon and people typically live longer in happy marriages. That’s not to say that anyone ought to put up with a toxic relationship either.

There are many very talented Marriage Counsellors available to help reconcile a marriage or relationship and typically their services are more emotionally rewarding and (significantly less expensive) than the services of a family law solicitor.

The Family Law Act 1975 also mandates that lawyers have a responsibility to help people resolve their issues before moving to what the lawyers do, which is sorting out the separation. Section 12C and 12E Family Law Act 1975 require lawyers to provide information regarding reconciliation services.

The often cited and well-known quote from Abraham Lincoln applies here as it does in every area of legal practice:

Discourage litigation. Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can. Point out to them how the nominal winner is often a real loser – in fees, expenses, and waste of time. As a peacemaker the lawyer has a superior opportunity of being a good man. There will still be business enough.

Getting a Divorce

Since 1975 there is only one ground for Divorce in Australia which is the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage evidenced by a period of 12 months separation.

Before this there were various grounds such as “adultery” etc that made this difficult area even more emotionally charged when it was required to establish fault by one party. On the other hand, some people may argue the current system makes it much easier to obtain a Divorce or encourages Divorce. However, the Family Law Act 1975 also provides that the principles to be applied by the Courts in exercising their jurisdictions must have regard to, inter alia (Latin for “among other things”):

The need to preserve and protect the institution of marriage as the union of 2 people to the exclusion of all others voluntarily entered into for life.
The need to give the widest possible protection and assistance to the family as the natural and fundamental group unit of society, particularly while it is responsible for the care and education of dependent children. (see section 43(1)(a) and (b)).

Section 50 provides some practical encouragement for people to be able to separate and get back together for a period of time. This section says that if a separation occurs, and the parties get back together (maybe to try and work things out), they can be back together for up to 3 months without having to “start over” on the 12 months continuous period of separation.

For example, Romeo and Juliette decide to separate. They separate for 6 months then decide to get back together. They get back together for 2 months until Juliette realises Romeo just isn’t the same as he was 20 years ago, and they separate again. Juliette would still be able to apply for a Divorce after another 6 months and the 12-month period would not reset.

In terms of separation, this is a more complicated area of law than you might imagine. Section 49 of the Family Law Act specifies it only takes one party to the marriage make the decision to separate and that separation can involve people being

Getting a Divorce is typically the final step usually the easiest and less complicated step speaking strictly in terms of the process. Emotionally it may be the most difficult.

A Divorce is simply “the termination of a marriage otherwise than by the death of a party to the marriage”.

So, while many people may use that term to describe issues such as property settlement, parenting arrangements, spousal support, child support etc, the Divorce process only terminates the marriage.

All those big words

One of the interesting things about family law in Australia (and dare I say in other countries as well) is the different terminology different people use to describe aspects of the family law system.

Reason for this include the legislation changing the terminology over time. For example, in litigation involving children originally the terms were “custody and access”. In 1996 these terms were reformed to “residence and contact” and then in 2006 the terms changed again to the current “lives with and spends time with”. Nevertheless, in my experience very many people still talk about getting custody. Another reason for this (in my opinion) is that family law seems to be an area where people offer each other “barbeque advice”. This is the situation where someone knows someone who “went through a Divorce” and at a social function will provide information based on their experience as to how the system works.

The reason why all of this is relevant to the topic in the heading is because people often seek information regarding a Divorce when in actual fact a Divorce is just one aspect of a multifaceted system.

If separation is inevitable you probably need information first and foremost. Family Law is incredibly complex and nuanced, and no lawyer can tell you what the outcome will be (ever). The more information we have in terms of the evidence the closer we get though.

Ultimately though our role is to help you to get you out of this situation with as much of your wallet, dignity and relationships intact as possible.

Family law advice

If you have any queries in relation to separation, divorce, de facto relationships, property settlement or child support payments, my firm Hooper Mill Family Lawyers can assist you with practical advice.

We are family lawyers servicing all areas in Brisbane and on the Gold Coast.